"Bastard" ~ Knowing The Truth

Someone whom once I knew charming and nice in fact is just a big jerk!

One night, a phone-call woke me up. It was about midnight and I was already asleep. Well, my fault that I didn't turn my cell-phone off. When I looked at the caller-ID, I knew it was him calling. I let it ring for some minutes before I finally decided to answer it.

From his voice, it was clear that he was a bit drunk.

"How many glasses did you have?"

"I don't know. I didn't count. Maybe about 2 bottles."

"So, what's wrong?" I directly got to the point.

He then told me that he was depressed. He had some probs with his business and personal things. I didn't comment much as I thought it would be useless to talk much to a drunk guy. I decided not to give any comment either when he said that it was partly my fault that I always had my excuses whenever he asked me out.

"I need a hug. I need someone to comfort me. I want you."

I didn't want to take the bait. Why would make things more complicated than it had been? So, I just let him say whatever he wanted.

"I know that 2 bottles are nothing to you. But you know they won't help you solve things."

"I know. But I can't help it."

"Well, I know how much you like drinking, but you've gotta stop it. You can't get away from your problems. Face them! Life isn't easy. You just have to deal with it and find the ways out. "

He seemed to take everything I said and admitted that he was wrong and I was right. After almost an hour, I decided to end our conversation. I couldn't talk longer as it was almost 2 a.m. He said he was sorry to wake me up in the middle of the night, but he had nobody else to talk to..so he just had to call me.

I guess my frequent refusals and reluctance had made him really mad that one day he sent me an sms which sounded ridiculously absurd. I sent him a reply afterwards, asking why on earth he did that. I hated him the very moment he wrote me all those shits. I was really angry that I directly dialled his cell number. I definitely wanted an explanation.

DAMN him! He turned off his cell-phone. Damn childish!

Since then, it was very hard to contact him. I tried calling and sending him sms, but nothing worked out. He turned off his cell most of the time. I even thought that he had changed his cell number. Darn! I couldn’t stand it. I hated it that I was left without any explanation. I’d been nice to him, listened to all his problems, and treated him properly. And look what he did!!!

Well, if he expected me to leave my boyfriend or even worse...cheated on him for a man with his quality, he could go to hell! I was really eager to punch him with my own two hands.

It took me almost 3 months to get over it. I still met him occasionally in family gatherings since then, but I didn't want to talk to him, even just for small talks. It's just too bad that I still had to behave like nothing happened in front of my family and relatives. That's why I always had excuses not to come to parties and gatherings as I wasn't sure that I could really control myself from punching his nose.

I thought that things were over and everything was okay, but in fact I was completely wrong. I found out the truth one evening, when aunt sisca's niece was staying at my place for a night. My sister, she, and I were talking about our relative who had just married a man of her parents' choice. I don't remember how we finally got into talking about 'him', but what I heard really made me angry.

I was after him for almost 2 years.
I made calls almost every night so that I got more chances to talk to him.
I showed my special feeling for him very obviuosly that made him a bit annoyed.
I begged him to ask me out simply to be able to stay around him as much as possible.
I was mad at him when he didn't invite me at his small b'day party that I avoid talking to him in some gatherings and parties held after the day.
I kept calling him even after I knew that his status was still 'married'. (Gosh! I didn't know about this at all. The last time I heard he was divorcing)

Damn Bastard! He had spread all those rubbish to some of my close relatives that he always hung out with. And the worse was they had been talking about it all behind my back for months and felt pity for my mother for having a daughter like me. Darn! How dare him turned all facts into dirty lies!!! I should have known that he's just nothing but a real jerk!

What a truth!